Mommy Hangin' On

A blog about one mother's desperate attempts to hang on to some kind of cool.


Follow Me

If you enjoy reading my blog, please follow me or "like" me on Facebook. Thanks!

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Most Annoying App Ever

As if the "stop copying me" complaint could get any worse...apparently there's an app for copying you.  Joy.  What's worse is that not only does it copy whatever you say, but it repeats what you've said in a super annoying kitty cat voice.  Great.  And we're fighting over it.

Friday, May 27, 2011


What is it about those housewives that makes the show so addiciting?

I went from being ashamed to admit that I watched it (insert any city of housewives here), to barely being able to contain myself from attacking someone (to talk about the latest drama, of course) who watches, too.

My favorite is New Jersey.

I can't help myself.  It's like an unscripted version of Jerry Springer, with no bodyguards to save them.  I want to be Jacqueline's friend, want Carolyn to be my second mom, hate Ashley, and I'm not sure about Theresa.  I kinda like the new girl, you know the wife of the brother who was insane and banged the table last week.  What is it with the tables???

Anyhoo...anyone else obsessed?  I also LOVE New York and want to know what Sonja has done to her face.  She looks amazing!

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Terrible Twos

Nothing like a late morning shit-fit to start a Saturday off right. 

Natalie is 2 and a half and brings a new kind of terrible to the twos.  She wants to do EVERYTHING by herself, even if it's not actually possible for her to do it by herself.  Most of all, she hates being rushed.

Which brings me to this morning...

We were late to Lucy's dance class yet again, so of course we were rushing, or rather I was rushing.  They were doing everything but rushing.  Lucy was climbing the tree out front in her ballet costume, Natalie was running in circles around the van, then insisting that she was going to ride in the back seat. 

Finally, I coerced her into her seat with promises of a new doll at Target.  We were off!  Once we entered the parking lot, all hell broke loose.  She actually collapsed on the concrete behind the van and refused to move, due to some imagined slight.  I resorted to grabbing her and carrying her into the dance studio, where she resumed her fit, in front of all the waiting mommies, whose daughters were, of course, already in class.  There was shrieking and crying, all done in the most excruciating tone and volume, the likes of which I've never heard.

Lucy and I went on with business as usual, ignoring this scene, getting her ballet shoes on.  Lucy, worried about her sister, said (at high volume of course), "Mommy, someone might steal Natalie from the front while we're in here". 

All the other mommies were listening intently to hear my reply to her innocent concern.
"Oh, honey, I don't think any one's going to want her today," I said with a laugh.  The other mommies laughed, too.  What else can you do in the face of pure evil?

Friday, May 20, 2011

Inherited Traits?

It's amazing how two girls, born into the same household, within two years of each other can be so different.

The oldest:  sensitive, sweet, rule-following, sleeps late, active imagination, princess-like

The youngest: scrappy, funny, early riser, fearless, headstrong, independent, fit thrower

The funniest part is that although the oldest looks just like my husband, she acts just like me, and the youngest looks like me, acts like him.

The parents:  amazed and awed every day!

Thursday, May 19, 2011


Sometimes the minute my husband walks in from work, he gets hit with the, "I need a break".

Take tonight, for example. 

After working a full day, I had some errands to run after work.  Then I picked up the kids, took them on a "pizza date", came home to plant flowers before they died (the flowers, not the kids), played outside, bathed them, chased them around as they ran from me (naked, of course), prepared a nighttime snack (since they didn't really eat on our date), told stories, and they still weren't nearly ready for bed (even though I was ready for them to be).

The other problem, is that even though I feel like I'm always rushing...somehow I'm always late.  Rushing out the door, but late to work.  Rushing to get home and let the sitter leave, after I've made a mad dash through the store to get some things we ran out of.  This would normally be fine, except there's no time to really catch my breath.  My kids are excited to see me and deserve their mommy time.  What's troubling is feeling like I have to rush home from work to be with the kids, and rush from the kids in the morning to get to work, feeling like I'm not really hitting a homerun at either.

Calgon, take me away.


Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Invisible Robot Granny

Ahhh, the invisible friend, or rather, in my daughter's case, Invisible Robot Granny. 
She came along around a year ago.  I get the "invisible", and the "granny", but why the robot?  Anyway, sometimes she visits quite often, or months can go by between appearances.  I myself did not have an invisible friend, but both my siblings did.  I understand this is pretty normal for kids, but sometimes I wonder...

When asked by her uncle Steve (who had his own Mrs. Brisby) what Invisible Robot Granny looks like, my daughter described her as having, "rainbow hair, eight arms, and large teeth".  She sounds a lot like "IT" the clown from a Stephen King novel, but Lucy doesn't seem scared of her at all.  In fact, Invisible Robot Granny can do amazing feats.

Invisible Robot Granny can fly, hide mommy's ipod, and apparently accidentally pee on the floor.  She's also the one who taught Lucy to say "dammit" to the dog.  Not surprisingly, Natalie can see her, too. 

I'm a little worried now, because Lucy asked me today if I knew her Robot Pirate Uncle from Greenland.  Yes, Greenland.  Her actual Granny got her a globe for her birthday. 

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Mysterious Potty Behavior

After seriously trying to potty train my daughter over April vacation, I gave up.  Well, not totally, but I figured, being that she ran away screaming each time I broached the subject, that she needed a bit more time.  It seemed that she didn't mind sitting in a wet diaper, or worse wet undies, and actually ran and hid when I tried to change her.  I took these subtle clues to mean that she was not quite ready.

We moved on, vowing to try again in a month.

Well, the strangest thing happened.  It seems that my daughter woke up on Tuesday and decided that she was potty trained. 

She started saying that she had to pee and that she needed to go on the pot.  She would stop playing, grab our hand, and lead us to the bathroom.  She actually got out of the tub to go, and she initiated every visit to the pot.  Even today, all day with the sitter and not a single accident!


 My husband asked me what happened in the last 24 hours to cause this drastic turn of events??  No idea.

 He is now taking all the credit for this phenomenon, claiming that his dramatic interpretation of the book, "No More Diapers For Ducky" was the cause.

What is going on??

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Scared and Delighted

My daughter turned four today.

It's an amazing thing, considering that I can still remember what it felt like when she was in utero and kicking away.  There's the old cliche that time flies, and mothers with college age children always advise you to "enjoy them while they're young" and "in a blink of an eye, they'll be all grown up".

I always just smiled and thought that I was MILES away from feeling that way.  Well, I'm starting to realize the harsh reality of the situation:  My daughter is growing up, even though I'm not ready in any way for that to happen. 

My daughters were born 15 months apart and things were hairy, to say the least, for the first couple of fact I think I blocked a lot of it out completely.  Now they're so fun and every day is an adventure.

It may be unhealthy, selfish, but some mornings we're all cuddling and I wish that I could just freeze time and that my two daughters would be this age forever.

I'm delighted that they're growing into two amazing, little people right before my eyes, and that's wonderful, but it also scares me to death. 

Will I wake tomorrow and find that they're teenagers who hate my guts?  I know it's coming.  Every day I vow to remind myself to enjoy every moment.